Saturday, January 26, 2013

From the Nursing Chair: Breastfeeding at Four Months

The sweet stuff:
They hold hands sometimes. They each other and at me.

The sour stuff:
They punch each other in the throat/eye/forehead, grab a fistful of boob and pull it out of the other's mouth.

The gross but cute stuff:
They suck on each others fingers.

The short-lived stuff:
They fall asleep.

Ah, sleep. The twin mom's obsession.

We are going to be sleep training next week, mainly because the boys don't fall asleep on their own anymore. Ever. Like, ever. They need nursing, rocking, bouncing, or a stroller ride to snooze. All night. Every nap. Amidst thoughts of "where did I go wrong?" I question whether this is a problem.

When they are both peacefully cuddled up next to me, I bask in their sleepy noises and little puffs of breath and it's not a problem, it's the best, most natural thing ever!

When one of them stirs after only 20 minutes, wakes the other with attempts to settle, finally reattaches and goes to sleep, but now the other one is awake/crying/wet/wants to play, it's a problem. A big problem. I have bounced an energetic 4-month-old on my right while another baby is sleepily sucking away on my left. It's not fun. For anyone. And it's worse when I just. Have. To. Pee.

I used to worry a lot about the boys having to adjust their own internal rhythms to match another person. It's not fair, not natural, they are short-changed, how will we ever get to know them as individuals, blah blah blah. I was an idiot.

The same schedule gives twins the opportunity to do the same thing at the same time. Different schedules and non-independent sleep take away the ability of twins to meet their unique needs.

We offer food at the same time. Squeak and Squish control how much they take in. By offering a common nap time, away from mom, the boys will get to determine their own sleep, as well as enjoy play time that is not curtailed by a slumbering brother.

Oh yeah, and maybe their mom won't go crazy because she'll have a chance to pee/eat/shower.

This is how I'm preparing myself for sleep-training. Wish me luck.

1 comment:

  1. Good luck! You're stronger than you know and settling them into a new routine will take strength of mind as much as physical strength. Keep going :) you will do it! I've only had single babies but our Oliver was the worst sleeper ever. I was never strong enough to correct him and he eventually self corrected at 3! But with Gus our youngest I was determined to make him a better sleeper and had the strength to keep him in his routine and he was a great little sleeper (never mind that I was still getti g up to an 18 month old!).

    All the very best! Wishing you more sleep and toilet time alone!


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